Today I went for a writing workshop that was designed to help prepare people for writing personal story monologues for submission to the next edition of Metaphors Be With You, which is themed Music so I am definitely considering submitting something! The workshop was conducted by Aimee, whom I had watched perform her own monologue at the last Metaphors a week ago.
One of the things she had us do was free writing based on prompts that she gave. I’ve been doing some free writing for my lyric writing exercises, but it’s way more fun when done in a workshop with someone prompting you. I also quite liked what I wrote in the end, so decided to share it here for you guys to read. The underlined words are the prompt words; all else is mine.
Music is the thing that brought me safely through my youth into adulthood. In the absence of consistent human characters, human behaviour, life circumstances etc, music was always a constant that I could depend on. A record once made remains in the same form that it was made, and lasts eternally. It can be shared without ruining the quality of the original (unlike Xerox), and it helps me access a world of fantasy. The songs I used to listen to tended to bring me to other worlds, which I did not have access to myself. Songs like those from musicals like Cabaret or Moulin Rogue, which I loved, took me into a world of glamour, but beyond that, the dark side of all the lights and sparkles. The dark side of the moon. I was also heavily into Linkin Park when they first started out, as they created a world which was dark, twisted, and very enthralling. I couldn’t believe my eyes at some of their music videos in particular, which featured creepy rooms, nightmarish characters and had a very strong sense of the tangled webs of one’s psyche. I totally get that because I get some really messed up dreams at night. I don’t consider myself a depressed or twisted person, but these dreams just come to me. I have no idea what might trigger these dreams because often times they are completely not connected to anything in reality, as far as I’m aware. For example, most of my dreams are about being on a mission; sometimes in a large steel-and-glass cityscape, or school building (which is unfamiliar), sometimes in a third world country in Africa. There’s also often betrayal, or suspicion, or some psychotic things happening. Sometimes when I think about these dreams it makes me shiver. These topics are really pretty disturbing, especially when I start to wonder why they even came about in the first place. Surely I can’t be a crazy person? What sort of monstrosity might actually be there, undetected, lurking beneath my generally positive outlook and usually cheerful personality? It’s so weird trying to psychoanalyze myself because it makes me feel like one of the characters in these musicals, like Sally Bowles in Cabaret, singing about how joyful it is to come to the Cabaret and cast your woes aside. But actually deep inside she’s hiding some deep pain and problems that she just simply isn’t dealing with. She has so much to hide under that bright smile and attention-grabbing vocal. I wonder if she is that way because she’s unable to find love. The kind of pure, selfless, beautiful love that people allude to in romance movies. Cabaret isn’t a romance movie. Neither is real life. It’s not sugar coated, not soft around the edges, sometimes not easy to swallow. But it is definitely a fascinating puzzle to try to figure out, one messed up character at a time.
Just some prose that I hope you enjoyed reading, for its own sake 🙂